Time for Kings fans to start dreaming again

Time to take a deep breath, Kings fans.

Your long national nightmare is finally over.  The city won.  The carpetbaggers lost.  And now you can clear your head and start dreaming.

You can dream about an ownership that aspires to NBA titles and not to bargain-basement personnel moves.

You can dream about a team that will be able to compete in the free-agent market.

You can dream about an arena in the center of a vibrant city center, a place where you'll want to go long before a game and stay long after.

You can dream about player stats instead of binding sale agreements.

You can dream about Travis Outlaw (okay, maybe that's going too far).  But you can dream about DeMarcus Cousins being coached by a top-notch thinker and motivator.

You can dream about a city that thinks big and takes risks because that's what world-class cities do, despite the knee-jerk blowback of doomsayers.  Yes, folks, the city will be a better place for having pro basketball and a new arena. 

Sleep well, Kings fans.  Because even though the big, bad Maloofs may want to cause more trouble before they exit stage left, the future finally has a clear and wonderful path.

  

Shocker: Kings post team for sale on ebay!

The Kings are for sale.  And it's finally public knowledge.

But just how public is this knowledge?

Very public.

You see, much to our surprise, the Kings owners have shockingly decided to list the team on ebay.com.  It makes sense.  What better place to get the money you so richly deserve?

It took us awhile, but we finally found the listing -- and it's mighty interesting.

First off, they've listed it for a Buy It Now price of $499 million.  That seemed like a genuine bargain until I scrolled down a bit and noticed that they also wanted $120 million for shipping and handling.

Too steep for my blood.  I'm a sucker for Free Shipping and this just seemed a little overpriced.

The seller -- some guy named MaloofusYou2013 located in Natomas -- posted a fairly compelling description of the sale item.

Here it is:

One-of-a-kind professional sports franchise in gently used condition.   Bid now for a chance to become part of an elite group of team owners.  Team is completely mobile.  Can move anywhere.  Or you can stay put and deal with the cowbell ringers and cocky mayor in this one-horse town.

Item comes complete with set of 12 life-sized professional basketball players.  Set includes one extra-large surly fellow with a lot of talent, one extra small former college sensation who has an interesting first name,  and one former rookie-of-the-year (could have some slight physical defects).  A number of players who seem to lack any ability at all are included to complete the set. 

The product comes with a full coaching staff, although we make no guarantees on their basketball knowledge or their ability to help your set of life-sized players in any way, shape or form.

As an option, we also offer a vice president who is slightly comatose, does not change expression, and was once was considered a genius (that probably no longer applies). 

Please, only bidders with legitimate credentials and big bank.  No wanna-be's, Jersey Shore types, or anyone with the last name Burkle.

All sales are final.  Unless we decide to change our minds at the last minute.

Good luck and good bidding!

We'll soon see if Maloofs are going to back up their words with hard cash

With the end of the lockout looming, it's almost time to focus on basketball-related matters again.

Specifically, free agency.

More specifically, the Maloofs and their wallets and free agency.

Just last spring, after the team was miraculously saved for one more season in Sacramento, Gavin and Joe Maloof pledged that they would finally open the bank vault and go in big for free agents.

Does anyone still believe that?

Because I sure don't.  The family finances are still in a downward spiral.  Sister Adrienne, of Beverly Hills Housewife fame, is even crying poor.

I'd like to be proven wrong, but I don't see how the Kings invest a ton of money this season.  I still think the owners bear a bit of a grudge against Sacramento for submarining their Anaheim deal.  They probably don't believe the city will get their act together on an arena deal so why spend money right now?  Do it after they go to Anaheim in order to make a big splash in Southern Cal.

Then again, maybe the Maloofs are newly committed to Sacramento.

But I'll believe it when I see them writing checks.  Unfortunately, there might not be enough in the bank to stop those checks from bouncing.

Cash-strapped Maloofs squirm as they go from whales to minnows

Is there anything more delicious than watching the cash-strapped Maloof boys squirm as their long-anticipated move to Anaheim slowly disintegrates?

I'll be honest.  I thought there were long gone.  And that's probably still true, but the events of the last two days are just fascinating to witness.

After playing ridiculous hardball with the city in negotiations for a new arena and then dismantling the team in the name of economics and killing the attendance, they are a bundle of mock outrage because an interloper has the nerve to make them look like small-time players.

Yup, welcome to the recession, Gavin and Joe.  You are cash poor and so are we.  How does it feel?

And now you're ready to blame Billionaire  Burkle for trying to move in and take your team.

Deal with it.

The Maloof brothers are like those Jersey guys in shiny suits who strut boldly and believe that outward signs of obvious wealth are what matter most.

Hell, Adrienne Maloof is the poster girl for such nonsense.  She paraded around the arena concourse Wednesday night, huge camera crew in tow, dressed to kill in designer clothes, and sporting a look so surgically enhanced you thought her face might implode at a moment's notice.

Yet this is the image Joe and Gavin and George Maloof want to convey.

Except for one important fact.

They're broke.

And Burkle isn't.

Suddenly,  the NBA owners are looking at the Maloofs as expendable.   The league is a club for the whales, not the minnows.

Is Sacramento an NBA town?  Maybe not.  But there's a guy with awful deep pockets who thinks it just might be.

And that might just be good enough for David Stern and the rest of the Billionaire Boys Club.