Friday, April 19, 2013

Maloof letter to NBA: The Portions You Didn't See


We were slipped a copy of the alleged original letter from George Maloof to the NBA.  Here are some of the juicier, redacted portions of the letter:

"The offer from the Sacramento group was, plain and simple, just paltry. Chicken feed. Play money.  In fact, we're not sure this Vivek guy is even real. Does he have a checking account?  We've never seen proper I.D."

"I ran the Palms in Vegas. Maybe you've heard of it.  It was the hottest place in town.  I know all about good deals. And this deal from this so- called group of whales is not good.  And please, don't tell me I ran the Palms into the ground. That is all speculation and rumors being spread by a dubious clandestine Sacramento organization"

"We tried to make it work in Sacramento.  We did what every red-blooded NBA owner in the league would do ... We tried to bleed every last cent of public money from the city in exchange for the right to take every penny of profit from a new arena, parking and naming rights."

"Mr. Stern, sometimes I get the feeling you think we are amateurs in the world of business. You treat us like we are little boys running a lemonade stand. Well, I tell you this: You are a stinky face."

"We really respect the fans of Sacramento. We would never want to treat them badly. But c'mon, Seattle!  Coffee. Alt bands. Guys with very heavy wallets. How could we not choose them?"

"Mayor Kevin Johnson hasn't been that fair with us.  I think he's upset that we don't kiss his feet and call him King KJ.  But look, we don't want to be responsible for the homeless of Sacramento going hungry. Or for half the elementary schools to close.  Or for criminals to take to the streets.  That's why don't want to take the Sacramento deal. We're doing it for the citizens. God bless them."


5 comments:

Dedo T said...

Is this real? This can't possibly be a legitimate communication from an adult business man to the NBA ... can it? How could anyone realistically negotiate with this level of immaturity?

Ron Wenig said...

Is this real? I think you need to read the description of my blog in the mast.

Dedo T said...

OK, so I went back and read it:
Kings Talking Points
Sarcastic, erudite, satirical and sometimes off-kilter opinions on the Sacramento Kings

So, when do we know when you're being satirical vs. erudite?

Ron Wenig said...

Do the words "You are a stinky face" help at all?

Dedo T said...

Gee, Ron, I thought George M. was being Jr. High immature. You two must be in the same Home Room!