Thursday, September 30, 2010

It's time for the Maloofs to unleash "The Threat"

Grant Napear and his cohort on KHTK, Mike Lamb, have have been spending a lot of time recently on the arena issue (or should we say the dead arena issue).

Both of these broadcasters have blasted the city for its ineptitude. No argument there.

But here's where they both go horribly wrong.

Both think Joe and Gavin Maloof should come out and say that they are here to stay for the forseeable future. Grant and Mike seem to believe this would comfort the loyal Sacramento fans and make it an easier atmosphere to reach a deal.

Wrong. Very wrong.

Here's what the Maloofs should say:

"Ladies and gentlemen of Sacramento, we have been patient and loyal to Sacramento for more than a decade. We have watched you fumble various attempts to build a world-class entertainment complex. We are losing money. Our arena is half full. We have no name for our arena.

We want to stay in Sacramento. We'd love to stay in Sacramento. But under these conditions, we can't.

That's why today we are giving the city of Sacramento a deadline of Jan. 15 to come up with a viable plan to build an arena or we will announce our intention to move the franchise."

Yes, Kings fans would likely collapse in a pool of their own vomit upon hearing this, but it's the only course of action.

You have to make the threat public. You have to establish real ramifications for failure. If not, there's no impetus to make a deal.

That's why tough labor deals only get made with the threat of strike.

I don't want the Kings to leave, but it's time for Shock and Awe.

It's time to break out The Threat.

Make the move, Maloof brothers.

And let's see what happens.

Video: Can Jason Thompson solve the Middle East problem?

Jason Thompon plays a game of  "Stud or Cop-Out" with Kings Talking Points and answers some very tough questions, including whether he will convert to Judaism after his trip to Israel and predicting the number of technical fouls he'll receive next year.

And as a bonus:  Jason gives us his best dirty look after a referee's bad call.

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Demarcus Cousins has a big body, small hands

Surprising fact: Kings rookie center DeMarcus Cousins can barely palm a basketball.  I watched as he struggled to hold a basketball with one hand during a photo shoot. He told me he had small hands.

Will that be a problem in the NBA?  Maybe, but he's no Duane Causwell so his superior basketball skills should overcome that shortcoming.

By the way, where is Duane Causwell?  I miss him so.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Video: Omri Casspi answers some very important questions - and some not so important

Omri Casspi stepped to the plate for a little "Stud or Cop-Out" with Kings Talking Points.  The results were very revealing.  You'll learn about which player in the NBA he'd most like to be compared to, his verdict on Sacramento vs. Tel Aviv women, and whether he's a Durant Guy or a Lebron guy.

Plus, a special guest appearance by Samuel Dalembert, who joins in on the fun.

Monday, September 27, 2010

Video: Does Tyreke Evans think anyone can stop him one-on-one?

Tyreke Evans was kind enough to play a little "Stud or Cop-out" with Kings Talking Points. Here's how the game works: Five questions. Five tough questions. Answer each honestly and you're a stud. Refuse to answer one and you've copped out.

In this version, we learn which Kings like to look in the the mirror the most, what Tyreke thinks of Brandon Jennings, and whether Tyreke would ever use a little fact to help him with women.

Oh, and he also tells us whether he thinks anyone in the NBA can stop him one-one-one. Have a look:

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Official Wildly Optimistic (and probably delusional) Pre-Camp Happy Talk

Camp is here. And wow I'm excited.

Well, not really. Maybe a tad pumped? Nah.

But hey, it's here, okay, so let's get it on.

And I'm going to be stay positive (in loving memory of Positive Dave).

But first a note of pessimism.


Run for the hills. The Maloofs are already packed and ready to leave town. The Kings will be playing in Pensacola by this time next year. Nothing but cobwebs here instead of C-Webb. All is lost. Including this season, which will mean nothing when the team leaves us high and dry.

There. Now back to our Positivity. Here are some reasons to get motivated:

Demarcus Cousins: A big load of talent. He puts us back on the basketball map with his sheer force of will. Love the attitude. Hates to lose. Leaves no prisoners. And he's got skills.

Samuel Dalembert: Lookee here. A shot blocker. Haven't seen one of those around these parts since, well, uh... you get the picture. No more driving the lane against the Kings like a carefree toddler in the park.

Tyreke Evans: Stud rookie. Bigger stud with a season under his belt. And a jump shot. Now if he could just learn to look for his teammates just a teeny-weeny more.

Omri Casspi: Guy hates to be off the court and that's a huge plus. Might have the most need to succeed of anybody. And my biggest prediction: Helps solve the Mideast problem during All-Star break.

Donte Green: This is exactly where Gerald Wallace was after two years in the league. We all know what happened to him. This time, Kings are patient and turn the potential into stardom.

Hassan Whiteside: A tall leaper project with more basketball ability than more tall leaper projects. Reportedly battled Attention Deficit Disorder. Kings must figure out a way to keep his head in the game. I'm doing my part by making him an honorary correspondent.

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Kings re-name arena - We have a Situation

Arco is history.  The naming rights have expired for the aging arena.  But no need to fear about all those lost monetary considerations associated with sponsorship.  The money will continue to flow.

You see, a new name is already bought and paid for.   The glowing neon letters are being crafted as you read this.

In the first scoop of the season for Kings Talking Points, my clandestine sources tell me that a new name has been  chosen for the arena.

And it's perfect.

Ladies and gentleman, welcome to...


Yup, there you have it.  After an exhaustive 2-day search, the Maloof brothers settled on a new arena  name that pays tribute to the shiny six-pack abs of the ape-like reality star.

Why, you ask?

Why not, I say.  This a brilliant stroke by the Maloofs.   A TV tie-in.   Appeal to the youth market.  Season-ticket bundles for Guidos.

It's a slam dunk.  And best of all, we don't have to worry about getting some awful-sounding company to plant their name on the building and make us feel awkward just saying the name.

"Hey dad, let's get going, I don't want to be late to Mucinex Arena."

"Meet you at  Orkin Pest Control Arena for a snack before the game"

And don't even think about local companies chipping in.   Bonney Plumbing Arena?  Wasn't gonna happen.

Now, The Situation, that's an arena name with panache.

"Let's hit The Situation tonight to watch some hoops."  "What a situation at The Situation last night"

And what about Grant Napear's new catch phrase:  "The Situation is off the hook.  Just watch out for grenades" (that one was for Jersey Shore fans only)

So there you go, Kings fans.

A new era for the team.

A new name for the arena.

And I hesitate to reveal my little secret about who's going to be singing the national anthem on opening night.

But here's a hyphenated hint from my extremely semi-informed sources: